Go with the Feeling

Go with the Feeling

“The Artist is no other than he who unlearns what he has learned, in order to know himself.”
~
E.E. Cummings

Minutes before the Full Moon in Gemini, I was listening to this inner voice saying so clearly, “ you will get about $2000 for your car.” The song “Can’t stop the Feeling”  by Justin Timberlake came on the radio, as different cars’ part flashed on my head and then suddenly the car in front of me stopped. I turned my car to the right to avoid it and clipped the bumper.

I said, “Okay, Universe, let me be surprised by the wonderful new things you have planned for me. “

I had been in good spirit and even after the accident, I continued to be focused and deliberate in action. I called 911, asked the other car if anyone was hurt, got my insurance information out, called my mom to come pick me up. I checked again with the young woman who hadn’t had an accident before and told them the routine. Attempted to ease her mind that she is fine and the car can easily be fixed.

It was all automatic for me. It was the third time and the last time (thank you Universe) for a totaled car. 2001, my Trooper has a mechanical failure and the car rolled over. I walked away.  In 2003, while driving down from Oregon on a road trip with friends, a drunk driver hit us. I walked away. Though I did get the reminder of “You are loved and loved! Don’t forget that.”  I haven’t and get a clue just how much this is true.

Throughout this last year, I had looked at cars and always back to the fact; I really love my little 2005 Spectra Five. I had just thought about replacing the tint on the windows and maybe a new paint job. This car fits me, though now I had outgrown the energy of this car and deserved something a little nicer. The Spectra Five now was cleared out and gone.

I am so thankful and grateful I am open to receive something new. I obviously release attitudes and things that had held me back from true progress. I have planted many seeds in my career, personal life… well, in all areas of my life; All with gratitude.

Now, I am, in a way, forced to sit still, without a car and focus on my new life and the new story I am co-creating now.  2016, year of completion, truly was a year of closing the chapters on many years of the good, the bad and lots of ugly.  The ugliest of all the contrast I had release now, seeing the damage and growth in my journey.  2017 is the year of new creation, new adventures, and new story.

And as E.E. Cummings said, I have unlearned things I had learned and realized more of who I am through this year of review and closure.  I am grateful for all of it and thankful for the insights and lessons I had been blessed with and understand now more about the power I hold dear.

Remembering the sweetness I have added to people’s lives, the smiles, comfort, the confirmation, inspiration, and strength. I have often heard from people since kids signed yearbooks “You are so sweet. Please don’t change.”  In the past, it felt like an obligation to be “sweet” or kind. Now it is an honor and a gift to share kindness and be just “me.”

Now focusing on keeping my word to myself first and then to others, all in service to the highest good. Having integrity means much to me and I have seen how I had punished myself when I felt out of it. Settling for less in all areas of my life is a change I am making. I deserve the best. Only the best.

I have manifested many wonderful things. I asked the Universe for a change agent to assist me in realigning myself to receive the best by being the best I can be.  A wonderful teacher came back into my life and I am now finishing up her brilliant class, “Thirty days to a Charmed Life.”  Bernadette Dickenson has been a good friend and a wonderful teacher/coach. We all need support. I am grateful for hers at the closing of this completing year. She is starting another one in January if you are interested.

2017 is a one year… a new story… new adventures and new possibilities. So write your new story. You know I am and I plan on writing more this new year.  Enjoy creating yours.

“Words transform both speaker and hearer; they feed energy back and forth and amplify it. They feed understanding or emotion back and forth and amplify it.” Ursula K. Le Guin

April 2017 UPDATE:  After realizing how much the local dealerships add onto the cost of the car… I told the Universe the right car for me is a private seller. I let go and went on with other things. I was still hearing from many people about getting the car. I focused on other things. One late afternoon, I decide out of the blue to go for a walk. along the way, I met up with a neighbor driving in who stopped to chat. He was selling his 2012 Honda Accord loaded with most of the things I was looking for plus more. The price was right and within a week, I got my car from a private seller at the right price.

The Universe listens… Are you?

 

The magic within your center

The magic within your center

Hold tight to the magic within you.
As the world’s chaos and madness seemingly expand.
Your magic is the key to getting through this
With your sanity, your soul and your being intact.
Focus within; on the love and know the love is real.
And this madness is the symptom of the healing the world needs.

Most of all, breathe, center and love. ~jh

Realizing the Process While Understanding the Progress

Realizing the Process

While Understanding the Progress

How many years do you need for the ruby,
through the Sun’s work,
to obtain its rich color and its dazzle? ~Rumi

 
Or a translation of this is… “Great projects and achievements require time and patience. Success will take time, but will come.”

Or there is a Divine Timing at play. Do what you must and it will come.

 At times, I feel like this is just an excuse for it not happening yet. Though through my experiences, it all catches up with you. Usually after one has forgotten what they desired. So I typically say it, write it and let go. I follow through (most of the time) on the things that just pop up in my head and continue on my day; focusing on the To Do list of the fun activities for my business.  I am so grateful for still doing my business. Parts have changed and others pop up and I enjoy my clients’ positive progress along the way.

I find my awareness is increasing on those past things I desired though some I dropped from my wanted list… They came anyway… though negative things I focused on too long, yet at the time…I didn’t realize what I was signing up for at the time.

Through waves of despair and wandering heart, I found the simple life I wasn’t expecting nor necessarily looking for yet I have all my needs met, so how can I complain? I am grateful for me being simply me.  As guided, I pull a few cards from Rumi deck. The basic answer in the overall is to be patience, it is coming. Be grateful for what you have and people and things are coming. Breathe.

 

The truth is I need to just know I am safe and trust the process. In my life, trust I am on track as the more I feel joy and less anxiety about the daily doings of the day…solutions appear to any situation troubling me. In some form or way, the answers I am looking for do come to me, as the cards suggest. Success will come.

 

Perhaps that instant gratification so many looks for comes quicker if they noticed it is coming and not the fact it wasn’t what they expected. The blocks created by this instant gratification situation are mounting up in the highest of place in the government as the dissatisfaction from many people feeling low and unable to get any satisfaction as all. 

 

It is in the displeasure or pleasure one focuses on is the reality created. The awareness of knowing the inner power one has opened the worlds to new possibilities or that potential.

Many blocks themselves yet know they have the power of change. It is only the choice to change that needs to realize and the powers they have handed to others in creating their beliefs along the way.

 

For example, I recently realized I had handed some of my business creation power over to a CPA I had been using. He strongly suggested keeping the business small years ago. Why the hell did I listen to him? The fact is I trusted many “tests” from the Universe on my awareness on my inner powers. I do remember not liking that thinking, yet I did follow his advice. So silly was I?!
Now I am no longer using his services, nor having any connect with him. Yet as I said, I listen to many people I trusted, including my parents and I paid for these…greatly.

 

I could only take responsibility and clear it out of me now as I was going against myself and stopped trusting myself. I actually felt that I had stopped living or began a shamanic death to clear all that unneeded advice and results. I needed to stop and recognize what I had created and the ways I created to change what I was creating.

 

Now things I need to let go  somehow get changed and poof… are gone. Of course, this is more on my wishes of simplifying my life and business to run smarter, not harder.

 

One of the last cards I pulled from Rumi was:

“Don’t go anywhere, I beg you;
the Moon you are looking for is inside you.”

 

Or ‘Realize that everything you need is where you are.’ 

 

Enjoy your present moment as all you need is in the present moment at this time. Embrace the sweet realization you are well on your way to receiving your desires… you just need to be open to receive them with the joy of them being present in every breath you take. ~jh

 

#jenhillmanreflections  #individualnotionofbeing  #PresentNow

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